dinner – AGENTS OF FIELD

With the fridge full, the freezer at breaking point and the cupboards packed with all things pickley, the allotment continues to give. Much to the growing concerns of my loving wife.

So in recent weeks, I’ve been taking my bounty into work and offering it up to workmates. Much to my delight, they’ve been snapping up my organic offerings with enthusiasm and appreciation. I don’t like to boast, but it’s mainly been the ladies, with the gents nonchalantly hanging around in the background feigning disinterest. It’s OK lads, there’s no shame in accepting a bulbous aubergine from another man, we’re apparently living in the age of the metrosexual. So embrace my veg and give thanks. Nevertheless, with all this female attention, I’m beginning to think of myself as ‘The Food Fonz’.

I see them eye me up when I walk in, ‘Is he carrying a bag?’, ‘Does it look big?’, ‘I need to get my hands on it’. No sooner than I announce my goods are up for grabs, there’s a stampede. I’ve never been so popular. If my winter veg takes off, I could be basking in female attention until next Spring. Praise be to Monty and his green-fingered wisdom! I’m so glad I got myself a polytunnel at the start of the year, it’s helped prove this old dog’s still got it!

Of course I say all this in fun, but genuinely I’m thrilled that people look forward to receiving what I grow. Not only do I get the enjoyment of deciding what to grow, nurturing it and harvesting it, but I share it with the people I care about. A trip to my ‘in-laws’ last weekend was an the ideal opportunity to take them a box of allotment goods.. And gain a few brownie points.

But the real icing on the cake is that my colleagues have been taking photos of their culinary creations to show their appreciation. So ladies (Hannah, Helen & July), you have my thanks!